so my best friend here is dating this guy, and i fucking hate him, for reasons that won’t be mentioned. (she knows why). anyways, whenever he comes around or he’s brought up i just bash on him and i’m starting to feel bad about it. everything i say about him, i mean. but she genuinely likes him and i know i’d be annoyed if i liked someone and my friend kept bashing on him. so im going to try to stop. but i could never trust or want to be friends with this guy. i can barely stand seeing him at school. gdsjkfghkdjhg

yesterday when brittney came over was really awesome. we walked around town and saw a movie. before the movie we went to this park and sat on some swings and just talked about everything going on in our lives. i’ve never had a friend that i could do that with. i am so grateful to have a friend like her. i seriously dont think i could stand this place without her. she knows so much about me. more than anyone. and im not worried about her telling anyone what ive told her. it’s amazing having someone i actually trust for once in my life. i cant even explain how lovely she is and how great of friends we are for each other. we just have so much in common. been through the same stuff pretty much, feel the same way about people, like the same things. its weird because i look like a complete fuck up and she looks normal. but we’re the same on the inside. haha. i dont know. i just hope i dont fuck up this friendship. i would die without her.

2 months, down to nothing.